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Life Rants Scripture

Love God, Hate Your Brother

During this morning’s sermon, 1 John 4:20-21 really stuck out to me. You see, one of my close family friends is in a weird/horrible family situation which leaves a huge-ass question mark on my head (and maybe on everyone else’s).  He and his siblings are Christians, and his elder siblings serve very diligently in their respective churches at their respective home areas. His siblings will willingly lay down everything in order to serve their churches (maybe with the exception of giving up something job-related)…

A few years ago, their dad passed away and at a family meeting a little while after the funeral one of his elder brothers exposes the fact that he has had issues with my friend since they were youth! My friend has no idea what he has done to deserve such resentment directed towards him, but perhaps it was his general attitude in life to always help his parents (and subsequently be slightly favoured all this time). He has also gotten flak from his elder siblings, such as a questioning of his faith, because he helped his mom arrange a predominantly traditional Buddhist funeral for his dad, rather than working against all forces/facts (ie. no church has records of his dad’s attendance in service) to push for a Christian-based one.

My friend is confused why his elder siblings would give him so many problems and judgment (ie. saying things like “I should give you a book so you can learn how to love and honour your parents”), since their mom is still alive and should have a more significant say in the proceedings; he simply followed the Bible commandment to honour your mother and father. What better way to honour your parents at such a time, other than to help whole-heartedly to organize a funeral the way your surviving parent wants it? What better way to minister to your unbelieving parent, other than to serve them without complaint and issue?

His elder siblings can quote the Bible, can lead Bible studies, can love and care for otherwise complete strangers, and can be so very Holy-Holy…but they couldn’t (or refuse to?) remember or read the above commandment (let alone verse), found in 1 John 4:20-21

20 If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot [1] love God whom he has not seen. 21 And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.

It may be difficult or seemingly impossible to adhere to everything the Bible teaches and commands, but for his siblings to place themselves ever-so-highly and yet hate on a blood brother, that just seems even more hypocritical than usual…

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Jermaine

Yeah man.

I can see where both sides are coming from. On one hand, from the perspective of the brothers, said brother could be compromising their faiths by participating in something that most would call against God. From their perspective, it’s more important to do what God wants us to do, rather than what a human wants us to do. But that raises the question: what does God want us to do?

You nailed it with Scripture. God calls us to love our brothers and sisters, and is clear that if we hate our brothers and sisters, how could we love God?

Would you consider what they’re doing to their brother to be ‘hateful’? The Bible is clear that we’re called to rebuke our brothers and sisters in Christ in love. Judging is Biblical.

“Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.” – John 7:24.

We’re called to do this unhypocritcally [LOL if that’s a word], like how the Pharisees did it (John 8:2-9, Mathew 7:1-5). So while we’re called to do these things, 2 things come into play:

(1) HOW we do it. We’re called to do it IN love. (Ephesians 4:2-3; 1 Peter 3:8-9; )

(2) WHY we do it. We’re called to do it without selfish intentions, with others’ well-being in mind. (Titus 1:13).

In conclusion…I think his brothers are right in terms of why they might be doing it, but certainly off-base if they’re doing it in a hateful way. If we do ANYTHING with selfish or hateful intentions, then what you’re doing doesn’t count.

My 2 cents. Or perhaps it was a Loonie (http://www.immisolve.com/assets/images/Loonie_reverse_viewas02.png)

– J

Jermaine

This is good insight. Like I said, rebuking is necessary but only when things line up how God wants them to. I’ll be praying for your friend — that’s a tough situation.

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